Categories
alphabet game glasses optometry

O is for Optometry

Not my most favorite O word, but I want to keep this blog user friendly

I don’t know where I would be without optometry. I would probably be squinting, walking into things, guessing what signs say. I used to have good vision, then, I hit 40. First, I just needed glasses for reading, but now I have progressive lenses. Not bifocals, but trifocals. I had no trouble adjusting to them.

The last time I had my vision checked my left eye has gotten much worse. The lens on that side is much thicker. The man taking the order asked what happened. Did I get in an accident or have a stroke? No, I don’t know why it got so much worse.

If you asked me what I could not do without, you can take a away my phone but I need to keep my glasses.

Categories
alphabet game neurotransmitters Uncategorized

Neurotransmitters

I don’t understand them well, but neurotransmitters rule my life. Too much dopamine and I get psychotic. Too little serotonin and I am depressed. Along with others like glutamate it is a delicate balance

I take medications and supplements to help restore the balance. They seem to be working. If only they did not come with side effects. My mouth is constantly dry to the point it is hard to talk. I usually carry a bottle of water everywhere. I am chronically fatigued which I believe is due in part to my medications. It is definitely worth those side effects to be functional

Chemical imbalance is one theory for mental illness. In my case it makes sense to me.

Categories
alphabet game money

Money, money, money

Continuing the alphabet game with the letter M.

I worry about Money. I imagine that is common.

When I was psychotic I would spend and donate to causes because voices told me I should. It could have been worse, but I was isolating so I did not have a lot of spending opportunities. I remember something popped up on the computer screen once. I thought it was a message and I purchased it. It was a year subscription to something we did not need.

So, my husband took over our finances. Now, I am unsure of where we are at, which makes me anxious. I should have him go through it with me, he will, When I am ready.

Categories
love Valentine’s Day

So many good “L” words

Laughter, life, listen.

I am choosing Love

I love my family. If it is possible, I may tell them too often that I love them.

My husband is wonderful. He did not sign up to be married to a woman with a mental illness. I was diagnosed 7 years into our marriage. He has stuck with and put up with me. I am so happy we found each other.

My son tells us he loves us even more than I do. He is a hugger and an all around nice person. My daughter is more reserved. She is great too, just quieter. I think she likes us. She loves the dog. We all do,

Valentine’s Day is coming up. We don’t really celebrate. My favorite day is Feb 15, when the candy is on sale.

Categories
kindness

Kindness

Moving on with the alphabet game

I am kind. It is one of my better qualities. And, people generally respond well. Occasionally, someone will try to intimidate me. I would say they mistake my kindness for weakness, but I have been pretty spineless. I am getting better at putting my foot down.

Yesterday, I was going to a pharmacy. I was waiting for a car to pull out, but he was taking his time, so I drove further. I found a parking space and it was not much more of a walk. The man came up to me in the store and told me how much he appreciated me letting him pull out. (I hope he did not come back just for that) It was unusual. I thought it was nice for him to thank me, but was unnecessary. That is the thing about kindness, it may not be necessary but neither is coldness or meanness.

Categories
career job

I don’t have a career

I have a Job.

I work as a peer mentor in a mental health facility. About the only place you can work where having experienced mental illness is desirable. But, there is no room for advancement. And, there is no certification or required qualifications in my state and the pay is not great.

I like many things about my job. I work part time and have nice hours. My meds make me tired and I don’t have to be in until 9:30, which is doable. I work 4 days/week. I can make appointments on my day off. The people I work with are friendly.

In a former life I worked in the field I studied. I was a clinical laboratory scientist. Until. a psychotic break changed all that. I determined it would be too stressful for me to attempt to return and let my license expire years ago,

This is a better fit for me.

At the end of the day, it’s just a job.